Chair row threatens UK-China relations

A dipliomatic row has errupted between China and the UK over the conduct of Chinese diplomats at the recent G8 talks taking place at Imperial College library. Britain has accused Chinese delegates of improper seating conduct, and China has refused to partake in the talks until the remarks are withdrawn

The row began over the Chinese decision to reserve chairs at key window locations at the debate. Sources say Chinese diplomats were seen setting up on all the desks near windows before the other countries had arrived at the talks, effectively reserving the most pleasant seats exclusively for China.

Under UN rules, countries are allowed to pick whichever debating desks they like, but the UK believes China has taken liberties with this rule. The UK ambassador to the UN, Lord D. Bate was quoted as saying "we believe the unnecessary reservation of preferential seating arrangements is unacceptable behaviour for a country of China's prominence." Junior UK diplomat Mo Shun told the QA "We had to sit by the periodicals because they reserved all those nice little tables next to the windows. They weren't even using them most of the time".

The row would seem superficial, but as veteran diplomat R. Gue explains, seating arrangements at debates are crucial. "It can get very hot and stuffy in there, you need a window seat. The outcome of the talks often hinge on who has the nicest seat."

Historian A. Jezago agrees. "Take the treaty of versailles as an example. Germany was widely expected to win substantial territorial gains, but British spies managed to sabotage their alarm clock. By the time the diplomats arrived all that was left was the one with the wonky chair."